At some point, in this lifetime or perhaps in another one, a fire will be lit inside you. You will become insatiably curious about the nature of reality, of consciousness, of what this all is, and how the pieces fit together. You will no longer hide away the overwhelming thoughts of infinite time, of space, of the certain death of your body. This longing to know will not be satisfied by any theoretical, measurable, philosophical, or intellectual understanding, nor by faith in words passed down over centuries or millennia, in an epic game of miscommunicated “Telephone”, from those who may have understood. No, this deep, intimate craving must be fulfilled by direct personal experience, an understanding of Truth well beyond the capacities of the intellect – and you will realize that this is possible, and has been done before.
Day by day, moment by moment, you will train, with great persistence and discipline, and gradually things will change, sometimes in thrilling leaps, but mostly in imperceptibly small gradients over time. The physiological control, comfort in the body, quality of the breath and the thoughts, the texture of awareness, a sense of fearlessness (what is the worst that could happen?). With perfect timing, the appropriate teachers and teachings will show up, in ways and in forms you could not have imagined. After experiencing unbelievable physiological and sensory phenomena, you will come across descriptions of precisely these experiences, articulated in texts written thousands of years ago, and you will know that you are not alone. This path has been walked before, and the trail is marked well, if you know where to look. There are many ways to find the trail, and an infinite number of trailheads. The fire will grow.
Pieces will come together, and you will increasingly see or sense different layers within the tapestry of space-time, and perhaps become aware of something brilliant and unchanging behind the tapestry. You will follow your trail, wherever it leads, with great determination and effort, but in an unhurried, efficient way. There will come a time when the inner fire becomes irresistible and all-consuming, and it will be time to let yourself jump fully into the flames.
Then you will be unstoppable along your path – despite all the obstacles and distractions, the suffering, the sickness, the injuries, the sun, the storms, the joy, the pain, the guilt, the hunger, the bliss, the slog, the peaks, the valleys, the deaths, the births, the doubt, the trust, the love. You will be unstoppable, until you are free.
Aleah Sommers 